I am an American. Not a German or Italian or a Scot, not really. I am a daughter, I am a sister, I am also a woman. Very few truths are set, from the moment of your birth.
I remember the story of a devout Tibetan monk who was believed to be able to tell fortunes. Knowing this, one of his students came to the monk insisting his fortune be told. After much insisting, the monk finally looked hard into his student’s palm “Well this is very interesting” he said “your future is uncertain.”
I get that, I do. Still, I miss the assurances that came with being ”Catholic” and practicing the rituals of my ancestors, my family. I miss the traditions of fish being served on Friday’s and a new dress every Easter. When we become seekers and try to define faith for ourselves, we journey alone. We no longer share sacred rites of passage - the confirmations, the bar mitzfahs, the vision quests that occur when we commit ourselves as adults to a specific faith.
I choose not to be limited by one custom, but in doing so I forfeit some of my heritage. Instead, I’m left stirring my one of a kind jambalaya of doctrines and eclectic soup of tenets which sometimes feels watered down.
I think a lot of people feel similarly for varying reasons. When my parents moved out of their house, it changed tradition for A LOT of people forever. Even though we’re still elebrating the same holidays, it’s…not the same. So it’s different from your situation, but similar in that there’s a certain feeling of displacement but on the other hand, you get to create your own rituals too.
Bonnie
June 9th, 2008
Longing / missing is an emotional attachment. As long as you are under its spell and giving it attention, it lives! It is simply an avenue toward some historical circumstance / person. Stop feeding it and it must wither and disappear. turn your attention to the future!
CJNJ
June 10th, 2008
[...] It’s hard to remember to give ourselves permission to be sad, frustrated, or confused. A recent comment talked about giving energy to emotions and s/he was right. You have to be careful not to fuel [...]
Carnal Zen » Blog Archive » Cirque de Dismay
June 12th, 2008
After spending some 12 years in Catholic schools, I became brainwashed into thinking that everyone was Catholic. Well, I am far from that path now, thank God.
Catholicism certainly doesn’t make one question anything. Thank God for my twisted path and journey in life, to discover and think for myself that true religion is the way we live our lives.
Great post!
Suzy
Suzy
July 13th, 2008